Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Big News

Almost exactly 3 years to the date that I was promoted to Senior Layout Artist at my job, my manager told us she was leaving work to become a stay at home mom. Six weeks later, this email was sent out company wide with the subject line "Garrett Promotion."

Good morning:

It is with great pleasure that I announce that Erin Garrett has been promoted to Directories Supervisor. Erin has been with Ascend for more than five years, working on such directories as MMPI properties, NASDA and, most recently, Miss USA. During Cindy recent maternity leave, Erin (with an able assist from Janine) provided leadership in the department and coordinated projects and deliverables.

Moving forward, Erin’s direct reports are Janine, Anne and Ashley. She also will be hiring a directories editorial assistant to fill out the team. As she fully transitions into her role of Directories Supervisor, Erin will oversee major scheduling, manage layouts, assess directories bids and new project evaluations, lead eMedia developments, provide answers to general directories questions as well as still work on a few directory projects.

Please join me in congratulating Erin on her promotion and new responsibilities.


To say I'm a little excited is an understatement. Can you believe someone has given me my own staff!?!? I fully expect to feel like I'm in over my head at some point or multiple points in time, but I think I'll model my managerial style after Michael Scott.

Friday, May 21, 2010

You're no good, you're no good, you're no good, eggy you're no good.

More than once now I have had a conversation with my co-worker about eggs and how long you should keep them. This conversation was revisited today when I said, "I had eggs in my refrigerator and I couldn't remember when I bought them so I looked for an expiration date on the carton and it only had a sell by date. How long would you say it's safe to use eggs after the sell by date?" Her response, "Oh, I wouldn't say more then a day or two." Which was apparently blasphemous to me, "WHAT!?! Two days? I was thinking a MONTH!"

Clearly, her and I have very different views on the life expectancy of food.

A third co-worker joined in the conversation and took the middle of the road answer saying "two weeks." She then added that there is some sort of water test you can used on your eggs to see if they are fresh or not. So I looked it up and decided to preform the test at home, because I still had the old carton of eggs in my refrigerator.

So here is the carton with the sell by date.

Here is an egg from that carton, clearly floating...egg fail. Verdict = rotten.

So now we know two months out from a sell by date is too long.

Then for kicks I thought I would try an egg from the new carton that I bought last night with a sell by date of June 9. sunk and rested horizontally. That would have been a disaster if I had gotten a different result.

So, what is the moral of today's blog? Don't print the stupid sell by date on food, I don't care when it's suppose to be sold by, I want to know on what day eating this food will make me vomit!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Distorted reality

This year's theme for the Miss USA pageant is "Waking Up In Vegas." The contestant photos for the 2K10 contest were released to the public on Monday and came under a flurry of debate for being "too sexy/racy/provocative/controversial." If you have no idea what I'm talking about just do a google news search for Miss USA and you'll see what I'm talking about.

I'm not here to discuss the morality of it all, where is the fun in that? I'm hear to discuss the reality of it all. Show of hands, who has woke up in Vegas? I have. It looks nothing like this. I mean, even at my most rested, hydrated-self, I don't look this good or happy to be awake. Although my hair can and has been that big.

If you're doing Vegas right, this is how you look when you wake up.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Happy Birthday Paul!!

I was in Wichita this weekend to hangout with my family and after a riveting round of batting practice with my nephew Paul, niece Emily and Grammy it was time for some girly pedicures. I was all set with a pretty pink color when Paul started the following conversation.

Paul: "What color are you going to paint with?"
Me: "That pink color right there, do you like it?"
Paul: "What about this color?" (hands me a hot pink bottle of nail polish)
Me: "Oh, that's a good color, should I use that?"
Paul: "Yeah, and I can paint your toes for you, if you want."
Me: "Really? You want to paint my toenails?"
Paul: "Yeah, I can do a good job."
Me: "ok!"

He did a good job, didn't he!?! I should also mention that afterwards, he said "Are you're toes dry?" "Yep." "Wanna go play catch?" Well played, Paul. Well played.

He's such an awesome little boy! He's also inline to some day be on my fantasy baseball team, I've already promoted him to bat boy of the HMC team.

He loves all sports, but we are still working how he ranks his favorite teams ;)

Happy Birthday, Paul!! I love you!

This used to make me laugh

but now it doesn't.

I didn't get a flat tire from a pothole, but me and my mechanic are 98% sure that hitting a pot hole a few days ago messed up my car and it cost me $347 to fix. I'm now debating if it really is such a bad thing that my left rear break was stuck in the "brake" least I could stop.

Funny conversation about it though. Brad called me and said, "Well, our technician drove your car and heard a couple of different sounds and we want to make sure we zone in on the one you were talking about." To which I responded, "Oh yeah, she's old, she makes lots of noises. It's not the squeaky squeaky sound, she's been doing that for years, I like that sound. It's the scary grindy noise."

With car logic like that it's a wonder I've kept the car running for so many miles...Dad is probably mostly responsible for this, I shouldn't take any of the credit :)